See if any of these scenarios feel familiar to you:   You’re arguing with your partner and start to feel overwhelmed. Even though they’re asking you to stay, you need to get out of there. You leave and ignore your partner’s calls for several days.   Your partner wants to snuggle up with you on […]

Are you looking for help with your Anxious Attachment? This article is for you.

  Pitching the idea of going to couples counseling to your partner is uncomfortable, to be sure, maybe even scary. It can be difficult to address getting counseling because, once the fight is over, you don’t want to rock the precarious boat that finally feels somewhat okay. Maybe you don’t think couples counseling will help […]

Content versus connection Oftentimes when I’m working with clients, their central concern is a desire to discuss issues about work, money, children, or their sex life: aka content What couples often don’t understand is that it is very difficult to talk about any kind of content if you are not connected to each other. Trying […]

Getting fired is a lot like going through a breakup.  It can be devastating, relieving, shocking, really difficult, surprisingly easy or all of the above.  It shakes your stability and your routine. If getting fired from your job is in the devastating category, here are a few tips: 1) Remember that getting fired is like […]

Often when I am working with my clients it is clear that one of the major reasons they are experiencing suffering is because they are having an Inner Critic Attack. This part of the self has lots of names.  Traditionally known as the Super Ego; it also goes by the Judge, the Gatekeeper, the Critical […]

Sometimes when I am working with clients they feel hopeless because they have identified that there is something that they don’t know how to do.  Sometimes this is a capacity that they haven’t learned (such as creating boundaries or sharing from their heart).  In other cases it is a practical skill that was never taught […]

“The doorway To your creation Is your wanting. Desire gave birth To the world.   Let yourself want my friend, Each wish is a blessed Treasure.   Let yourself want my friend, The Earth longs To hear your Whisper.   Let yourself want my friend, For your yearnings Are not too big, Not impossible In […]

Hopelessness—it hits most of us, one time or another. Sometimes I feel like most of my clients are trying to convince me that some part of their lives is hopeless.  They have all kinds of reasons that they can’t have the relationship, the career, the health, the money or the peace that they want.  At […]

I love this poem from Rilke: “Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love.” I think about it a lot when I am working […]