Possibility

It’s Not About the Content

2017-10-18T01:52:32+00:00

Content versus connection Oftentimes when I’m working with clients, their central concern is a desire to discuss issues about work, money, children, or their sex life: aka content What couples often don't understand is that it is very difficult to talk about any kind of content if you are not connected to each other. Trying to talk about important issues while you’re feeling defended or angry leads to fighting, and the content gets lost. The trick to getting through content together is managing the connection you have with your partner. As soon as you realize that you are disconnecting, try to [...]

It’s Not About the Content 2017-10-18T01:52:32+00:00

On Getting Fired

2013-06-07T00:10:06+00:00

Getting fired is a lot like going through a breakup.  It can be devastating, relieving, shocking, really difficult, surprisingly easy or all of the above.  It shakes your stability and your routine. If getting fired from your job is in the devastating category, here are a few tips: 1) Remember that getting fired is like a death.  With death comes grieving and a lot of feelings.  Grieving typically has 5 stages: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance.  You might catch yourself bargaining "If only I had just done this project on time then maybe I wouldn't have lost the job."  Or [...]

On Getting Fired 2013-06-07T00:10:06+00:00

Transforming Hopelessness- Tip of the week: Don’t be afraid of what you don’t know

2012-02-08T00:42:33+00:00

Sometimes when I am working with clients they feel hopeless because they have identified that there is something that they don't know how to do.  Sometimes this is a capacity that they haven't learned (such as creating boundaries or sharing from their heart).  In other cases it is a practical skill that was never taught to them (bookkeeping, scheduling).  Sometimes it is just that the future is unknown, and they want it to be known, dependable. Here is a tip that can really relieve a lot of stress: There is great beauty and blessings in not knowing.   First of all, [...]

Transforming Hopelessness- Tip of the week: Don’t be afraid of what you don’t know 2012-02-08T00:42:33+00:00

Transforming Hopelessness #2

2015-06-08T22:38:09+00:00

"The doorway To your creation Is your wanting. Desire gave birth To the world.   Let yourself want my friend, Each wish is a blessed Treasure.   Let yourself want my friend, The Earth longs To hear your Whisper.   Let yourself want my friend, For your yearnings Are not too big, Not impossible In the scope of all That is.   Let yourself want my friend, I promise it won’t break you But bring you closer To your Greatest Power. " -Sefora Janel Ray   Wanting.  Desire.  Longing.  It's crazy how we can sometimes keep ourselves from really feeling what [...]

Transforming Hopelessness #2 2015-06-08T22:38:09+00:00

Transforming Hopelessness #1

2011-08-17T18:27:35+00:00

Hopelessness—it hits most of us, one time or another. Sometimes I feel like most of my clients are trying to convince me that some part of their lives is hopeless.  They have all kinds of reasons that they can't have the relationship, the career, the health, the money or the peace that they want.  At the same time, a part of them desperately wants to know that it is actually not hopeless after all.  It's like a clash of the two movies "Reality Bites" and "Field of Dreams".  One part of them is despondent and depressed, and the other part is hoping beyond [...]

Transforming Hopelessness #1 2011-08-17T18:27:35+00:00

The Dragon’s in Our Lives

2011-08-16T21:28:46+00:00

I love this poem from Rilke: "Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love." I think about it a lot when I am working with my clients.  So often we have strong feelings of pain, jealousy, disgust or rage that seem like awful feelings.  In a way, those feelings are dragons.  They seem gnarly and evil, snarling at us to pay attention to them.  They also feel out of control and like [...]

The Dragon’s in Our Lives 2011-08-16T21:28:46+00:00

Inspiration from Rilke

2011-08-14T06:42:26+00:00

Believe that with your feelings and your work you are taking part in the greatest; the more strongly you cultivate this belief, the more will reality and the world go forth from it. Rainer Maria Rilke

Inspiration from Rilke 2011-08-14T06:42:26+00:00

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